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Varendil Dawnblade Is

Neil Patrick Harris.



It’s Cyber Monday, you know what that means, right?!



Have you visited Varendil and I’s new blog yet? It’s pretty amazing.

And he talked non-stop, like a parrot of the sea he was.

So Varendil and I are officially a couple, even if the Facebook pages don’t say it yet. Since we are far away and need something to do with each other when WoW fails, MST3K isn’t working and we don’t want to watch any other tv shows together, we decieded to become the nerdiest couple out there.

We have a blog together.

The Role Player’s Lament. A blog about the wonders..and horrors of flag RSPs. Please, check it out, won’t you?

I know, we are elitist jerks..but we mean well, I promise!

OOC <3

The crying elf dug her hands into a pouch, pulling out a small silver coin and closing her eyes, tears still streaming from the fel green orbs.  Pushing the coin to the trembling lips, she tried to whisper into the coin, holding back the tears of unrequited love to make her wish.

“I wish we would both stop denying what is there…” She kissed the coin and flicked it toward the fountain.

“I desire to be with him and only him.”

The coin hit the fountain, making a splash.

A few months back, I wrote the story of the Wishing Well in Dalaran. Cute, romantic and nostalgic, I found it to be one of my favourite stories. A few weeks ago, I read it again and the lines above hit me.

I had written part of this story not from Lanuria’s prospective, but from my own.

Some of you knew of the boy I dated in my town. We had a good run, he was a sweet boy, but things didn’t work out. A combination of different political views, religious aspects and having almost nothing in common worked together to bring me to the fact we couldn’t work out.

It didn’t help I was falling for someone else as well.

I felt guilty. I finally confessed to both the boys my feelings for this boy…after a month of trying to convince myself I didn’t like him. It didn’t work.

My in character romance finally crossed the line I thought it never would. I worked so hard to prevent it from happening, I fought so hard against the fact I was slowly falling for the boy behind Lan’s husband.

But it was futile. Pointless. It happened. It happened a long time ago and I just refused to admit it that I adored him.

I finally confessed my feelings to him. It was mutual. All those months of role plays between Lan and Varen, and so much, so much of it was us trying to confess to one another.

On November 17th, I board a plane in Orlando to Madison, Wisconsin to see him for six days. This is a huge step for any one. For two people who are just recently admitting to their respective crushes and getting together for six days, it’s nerve wracking.

While most people start IC relationships with people they are in relationships with OOC, Varendil and I are the opposite. But it’s scary. I worry if Lan and Varen ICly will be affected by what happens in less than three weeks. I couldn’t stand the thought of losing Varendil in my real life and Lan? She would –die- if Varendil wasn’t home every night, waiting for her with a smile. One of my main worries about my trip is that the relationship between Lanuria and Varendil will be changed.  I am not too worried about what happened when I meet him, I know it’s going to be a good time and the six days I am there will fly by, I know it.

An OOC relationship coming from an IC one is a new, scary thing for me. I usually don’t do this, and I worked so hard against it. But I’m getting ready to take the trip of a lifetime to see a wonderful person.

I wanted to tell my blog readers of this, as it’s a little important to me. You people who read this are my friends and deserve to know of the drama that has kept me away from really writing.

Is it bad I hope our romance is way better than Lan and Varen’s?

Let’s play a game!

Let’s find the story that while being something Lan would say, totally has an OOC meaning to it!


Winnar gets me to actually post something I’ve been needing to post.


((Varendils need not participate!))

Hay Kids, like getting married?

Of course you do!

And do I have the right person for you!

Honest Varen’s Discount Weddings is finally opened for business!

((Oh shiii))

Sorry the second chapter has taken so long, I’ve had a bit of real life to deal with.

From relationships, work and the passing of Varen’s momma, life has been a bit of a rollercoaster. Just when I thought things were finally working themselves out and getting back to playing WoW, writing and enjoying my new Xbox…

I start to feel kind of crummy.

At work, I’ve been taking quite a few bathroom breaks. I’m always thirsty, damnit, I can’t stop eating, I’m tired and Red Bulls and what not make me even more tired.

I swear, I thought I was just a hypochondriac, thinking I was sick for no real reason. Eh, I work at a gas station and everyone comes in there sick. I’m just fighting off a cold, I said.

This went on for a month or two, maybe a little more. But last night, I just couldn’t stand it. I told my mom I wasn’t feeling well, about how I needed to use the little girl’s room a lot, how I’m always drinking (I swear, I have like a bajillion soda cans on my desk) and I can’t stop eating.

My mom is a diabetic, has been since she was 10. So she decided to test my blood sugar, just to see.  After the tiny little prick to my finger and a small amount of blood, my mom’s face turns a disgusting pale colour and holds the little monitor close to her heart, which I am sure was breaking at the time.

My blood sugar was 447. A normal person’s? 70 to 150.

Now, to those who don’t know anything about diabetes minus Wilford Brimley and his awesome ‘stache, it’s a disease that effects how your body makes sugar and uses it or something like that. If you really want to know more, check out the Wiki. I still don’t really understand what is going on. It’s all so surreal.

So, now I can’t drink sodas. Ever. No caffeine. No candies, no sugars, less breads and pastas and smaller meals and much more exercise. It’s going to be a lot of work and as I sit here drinking a Sprite Zero and testing my blood sugar (330) and wanting something to eat that DOESN’T taste like cardboard, I feel like curling up into a little ball and sobbing because I feel broken.

I’m only 23. My Opa, he had this when he was much older, maybe in his fifties. He got real sick, had a foot cut off, it was painful. I worry I’ll end up an old bitter person like he was.

I know I can handle it, but I want you all to handle this as well and make sure it doesn’t happen to you.  Don’t eat crappy foods, don’t live off burgers and Cokes, try and break away from the computer a bit and go for a jog or even a walk. I’m sure once it cools down here in Florida, I’ll be outside a bit more, walking and enjoying myself.

But this is hard and I don’t really know how to cope with it. At least Lanuria still has her cupcakes.

Also, because I want to laugh at myself, enjoy this video.


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